First off I would read this
excellent guide by Gigi and then the other Stickies in this forum.
That will give you a better understanding of what you can do.
As to not being able to change the sync settings, that may have to do with Outlook.
Outlook needs to be setup on your PC whether you use it for Email or not, it is the main program that ActiveSync connects with.
You will find the online user manual
Here