Well, how about 25 greatest "short" people... (snipped from my favorite mag, Maxim. :))
25. Andrew Carnegie
1835–1919
Height: 5'0"
Claim to fame: Man of steel.
The short story: Scottish weaver’s son built Pittsburgh’s steel mills and raked in a fortune. Then he gave it all away—libraries, concert halls, museums, universities—so that a Mr. Burns–like stigma wouldn’t haunt his diminutive grave.
The extra inch: Even as a child, ”the Little Boss” possessed a furious work ethic, laboring as a “bobbin boy” in a cotton factory to help his mama put lumps of inedible Scottish cuisine on the table.
24. Doug Flutie
Born: 1962
Height: 5'10"
Claims to fame: Uncorked “the Pass” to beat the evil Miami Hurricanes in 1984. Pro all-star in two different leagues—if you count the CFL.
The short story: Yeah, this ageless cult-favorite Patriots QB (still active at 43, he has his own rock band and once had his own cereal brand) would tower over a lot of guys on this list. But in a job where 6'2" is considered borderline dwarfism, he’s become almost larger than life.
The extra inch: Coaches have been telling Flutie he’s too short for, oh, 20 years now. But he won the Heisman and three Canadian championships, and made the NFL’s Pro Bowl in ’98.
23. Ross Perot
Born: 1930
Height: 5'7"
Claims to fame: Two folksy/bizarre runs for president. Richer than your entire family tree.
The short story: Tiny Texarkana tycoon is as wild as he is pint-size: He organized his own commando raid in Iran, and gave Clinton and Bush 1 fits with his fire-eyed 1992 presidential run. Started Electronic Data Systems in 1962 with a $1,000 loan from his wife, then sold it for $2.5 billion.
The extra inch: Matched against a sitting and future prez in the ’92 debates, Perot stole the show with his hick twang.
22. John Keats
1795–1821
Height: 5'0"
Claim to fame: Pale poet discovered the power of art—it makes women overlook your complete lack of brawn.
The short story: The puny prose profferer expired at 25, but his famously fruity poetry left the line “a thing of beauty is a joy forever” to future generations of guys looking to get lucky with drama chicks.
The extra inch: Lord Byron unkindly called Keats a manikin, but that didn’t stop the runty Lothario from making moist the panties of polite society.
21. Ron Jeremy
Born: 1953
Height: 5'6"
Claim to fame: Hardest-working man in porn, claims a résumé about 5,000 women long!
The short story: Hirsute sex widget was a special ed teacher before a girlfriend sent his picture to Playgirl. The rest is wank-flick history. With 1,000-plus films beneath his belt, the Hedgehog is the most recognizable man in porn.
The extra inch(es): Half as wide as he is tall, but once he whips out his (at least) 10-inch costar, he transforms into a blindingly handsome leading man.
20. Kurt Cobain
1967–1994
Height: 5'7"
Claims to fame: Leader of Nirvana. Married Earth’s most obnoxious woman.
The short story: Even before the Goodwill threads, “rape me” pleas, and Courtney Love browbeatings, the tortured Nirvana frontman was hardly a tower of power. Channeling his trademark howl through a slight frame, Cobain seduced a generation of music fans—but accidentally paved the way for Limp Bizkit.
The extra inch: Short, weird, skinny guys weren’t too popular with the loggers and jocks in rural Washington State, but Cobain played up his shrimp status, hanging out with gay kids to antagonize meatheads.
19. Prince
Born: 1958
Height: 5'2"
Claims to fame: Only pop artist who can sing about female “self-service,” strut around in a purple suit half his life, and still be considered the Man.
The short story: Despite looking more like president of the Little Lord Fauntleroy Society than leader of the New Power Generation, the sex-funk witch doctor has tagged a slew of superfine honeys, including Kim Basinger and Carmen Electra. Turned Sheena Easton bad with “Sugar Walls.”
The extra inch: You’d dress in lingerie, too, if it meant you could rocket upward courtesy of six-inch platform shoes. Well, you would if you were this short and had the mojo to pull it off.
18. Bruce Lee
1940–1973
Height: 5'7"
Claim to fame: Passive-aggressive ass-kicker brought martial arts to the round-eye.
The short story: Beaten by street thugs at 14, “the Little Dragon” dedicated his life to the idea that one should “learn to endure or hire a bodyguard.” It was the last fight he ever lost. Destroyed everyone from Chuck Norris to hordes of attackers with bullet-fast backhands and menacing kitty noises.
The extra inch: How do you know you’re tough? When Steve McQueen and James Coburn are your pallbearers.
17. Jeff Gordon
Born: 1971
Height: 5'7"
Claim to fame: Cali golden boy showed NASCAR’s cracker power base how to win their own races.
The short story: No one makes left-hand turns for three hours better than the most-hated four-time champ in NASCAR history. Also credited with bringing the ultimate redneck sport out of Wal-Mart and into, well, Olive Garden.
The extra inch: El Gordo began racing go-carts on the teenage circuit at age nine, but proved so dominating he was forced out.
16. David Eckstein
Born: 1975
Height: 5'7"
Claim to fame: St. Louis Cardinals shortstop (seriously!) looks like a five-year-old but owns World Series jewelry.
The short story: One scouting report says Eckstein boasts “no appreciable baseball skills.” Guess that’s why he bashed three grand slams in 2002, led all MLB shortstops in 2004 with a .988 fielding percentage, and once went 4-for-4 off Pedro Martinez. Dude sucks!
The extra inch: From a family of survivors (three siblings had organ transplants), Eckstein’s hacked out a career on grit and hustle that began when he had to walk onto the Florida Gators baseball team where, naturally, he became a first-team All-American in 1996.
15. T. E. Lawrence
1888–1935
Height: 5'5"
Claims to fame: Helped liberate the Middle East from colonial oppressors. Set up awesome countries like Iraq. (Thanks!)
The short story: After a bunch of Indiana Jones–like expeditions before World War I, “Lawrence of Arabia” became a Brit spy, organizing Arab guerrilla forces against the Turkish empire.
The extra inch: The no-drinking, no-smoking, vegetarian fitness fanatic was also a speed fiend, dying in a motorcycle accident while clocking about 100 mph.
14. David Ben-Gurion
1886–1973
Height: 5'0"
Claim to fame: Founder of the State of Israel.
The short story: Chest-high firebrand led the Haganah, badass paramilitary outfit that grandfathered today’s Israeli army.
The extra inch: Despite a Yoda-like appearance, the stumpy Ben-Gurion was known for his magnetic charisma. As Israel’s first prime minister, he beat back a five-way Arab gangbang, doubled Israel’s population in its first five years of existence, and even made friends with the Germans.
13. Ronnie James Dio
Born: 1942 (year unconfirmed)
Height: 5'4"
Claims to fame: Replaced Ozzy in Black Sabbath. Claims to have invented metal’s franchise “devil horns” hand sign.
The short story: Gap-toothed Italian-American squib looms large on the metal landscape thanks to vocal cords of serrated steel and sinister elfin presence. Legend says Dio split Sabbath because the band’s roadies often set up seven-foot-tall mike stands in front of milk crates.
The extra inch: The diminutive dark wizard is still touring in his 60s.
12. Pat Morita
Born: 1932
Height: 5'3"
Claim to fame: Ultimate movie sensei.
The short story: Made his mark indoctrinating awesome thespian Ralph Macchio in The Karate Kid. Before the lethal crane kick, had roles in generation-defining shows like Happy Days, M*A*S*H, and The Love Boat, and rocked the ’60s stand-up scene under the un-PC nickname “The Hip Nip.”
The extra inch: Perhaps the only Hollywood star ever locked up in a World War II internment camp, Mr. Miyagi had plenty of Zen fury to channel.
11. Diego Maradona
Born: 1960
Height: 5'5"
Claims to fame: Soccer god. Cheating cunt.
The short story: Suffered a coke-related heart problem in 2000 and reached a lardy 267 pounds. In his prime, however, the Argentine futbol king’s how-the-hell-did-he-do-that goals made him one of the most famous humans alive.
The extra inch: Against England in the 1986 World Cup, used his fist to pop a ball into the net, then hypnotized five defenders with dazzling jukes, a legit score voted “Go-o-o-o-o-al of the Century” in 2002.
10. James Madison
1751–1836
Height: 5'4"
Claims to fame: Shortest commander in chief ever. Wrote most of the Constitution.
The short story: Despite weighing just 100 pounds, Madison bulldogged the Constitution and Bill of Rights into law, kicked ass in two elections, and fought off the limeys in the War of 1812. Not bad for a guy once compared to a dried-up apple.
The extra inch: Scored when he married Dolley, a sassy, snuff-snorting good-time girl who offset his own single-minded desire to create a country.
9. The Hobbits
Heights: Elijah Wood (a.k.a. Frodo): 5'6"; Sean Astin (a.k.a. Sam): 5'6"; J.R.R.
Tolkien (Hobbit honcho, 1892–1973): 5'5"
Claim to fame: Biggest geek heroes of all time.
The short story: True, hobbits are supposedly only 3'6" on average. But since Lord of the Rings director Peter Jackson didn’t want to do his casting in Lilliput, he used FX to make Wood and Astin shrink-to-fit for his blockbuster epic.
The extra inch: Tikey scribe Tolkien considered himself a hobbit in human form.
8. Jon Stewart
Born: 1962
Height: 5'7" (counting the hair)
Claim to fame: Fake news godfather.
The short story: On Comedy Central’s The Daily Show, Stewart inspired an entire generation to shuck off its cynicism, overthrow the hypocrite Beltway power thieves, and…well, he hosted the only 2004 election coverage worth watching, anyway. Endeavors to point out that today’s mainstream media has the same news value as Cops.
The extra inch: The former Jon Leibowitz absorbed early career-killing moves, then rode his “Enhancement Smoker” role of Half Baked—“You ever see the back of a $20 bill…on weed? Oh, there’s some crazy shit, man.”—to iconic status.
7. Martin Scorsese
Born: 1942
Height: 5'4"
Claims to fame: Cinema superdirector. Nipple-high to Leonardo DiCaprio.
The short story: The genius behind Taxi Driver, Raging Bull, and GoodFellas was once an aspiring priest. Instead, he decided to make the most intense man-flicks ever—coincidentally giving lots of work to fellow micro-Italian Joe Pesci.
The extra inch: A sickly kid, Scorsese spent a lot of time chilling with TV and movies. More robust as an adult, he’s now on marriage number five.
6. Yoda
Born: 900 BSD (Before Senate Dissolved)
Height: 2'2"
Claim to fame: Leader of Jedi he is! (OK, we’ll never do that again.)
The short story: OG Star Wars fans knew Yoda as a decrepit swamp-dwelling 900-year-old Muppet who could still outact Mark Hamill. In George Lucas’ FX-heavy new trilogy, a younger Yoda zings round the joint like a Force-powered gherkin.
The extra inch: Green-skinned guru trained young Jedi to, like, protect the Galactic Republic and stuff.
5. Yuri Gagarin
1934–1968
Height: 5'2"
Claims to fame: First man in space. Teddy-bear-size Cold War mascot.
The short story: Undergrown peasant became Big Man on Earth when he orbited the globe a single time in 1961. Unfortunately, he then turned to Sweet Mother Vodka and started stepping out on the missus. A plane crash put an end to that in 1968.
The extra inch: Gagarin’s compact frame fit nicely in the snug Vostok1 space capsule—even with a helmet the size of a woolly mammoth’s skull.
4. Naim Suleymanoglu
Born: 1967
Height: 4'11"
Claim to fame: Olympic weightlifting champ, a.k.a. “Pocket Hercules.”
The short story: An ethnic Turk born in Bulgaria, Pocket Hercules defected in 1986. After Turkey paid Bulgaria a cool million for his Olympic services, the pint-size titan rolled up three golds, thus launching the “Curse of the Naimbimo” that plagues Bulgarian athletics to this day.
The extra inch: In his prime Suleymanoglu could jerk almost three times his body weight.
3. Napoleon Bonaparte
1769–1821
Height: 5'4"
Claim to fame: French emperor (considered prestigious at the time).
The short story: Fun-size dictator remains military big dog 180 years after croaking. Not only conquered most of Europe, but gave his name to an entire psychological complex.
The extra inch: Hyperambitious ruler hijacked the French Revolution, perfected modern military tactics, crowned himself emperor, and invaded…everywhere. All to compensate for shortness? Well, that’s what they say.
2. Spud Webb
Born: 1963
Height: 5'7"
Claim to fame: Won the 1986 NBA Slam Dunk contest with a cannonball-like reverse ka-pow.
The short story: The dunk victory insured the jumpy superfreak short-set immortality and paved the way for NBA Smurfs like Muggsy Bogues and Earl “I Really am 5'5", Honest!” Boykins.
The extra inch: His junior high school coach told him to sit in the stands at tryouts, but Spudster clawed his way to the NBA via junior college and the minor leagues.
1. Angus Young
Born: 1955
Height: 5'2"
Claim to fame: Satan’s guitarist.
The short story: After dropping out of school at 15 and working for a porn mag, the self-taught (surprise!) master of two-chord blare managed not to choke on his own vomit, thereby becoming coauthor of “Hell’s Bells” (and virtually every other song by the real greatest rock band ever), rather than its unfortunate inspiration.
The extra inch: Along with the trademark schoolboy threads, Angus has kept his adolescent strut. “I’m sick to death of people saying we’ve made 12 albums that sound exactly the same,” he once said. “In fact, we’ve made 13 albums that sound exactly the same.”
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Now I don't feel bad being 4'10", since taller I am compare to Yoda.
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