Desktop has a real internet routable IP, Handheld is behind a Linksys Wireless router with a 192 IP. I can connect to the desktop but if never syncs. I get the following error message after a few minutes.
Critical communications services have failed to Start. To correct this error, quite all programs and restart Windows.
I am running into this exact same thing, and am looking for a solution as well.
I have also routed the ports (990, 999, 5678, and 5679) to the computer that has activsync on it after reading that those ports are used, but still nothing.
Try disabling your software firewall on the PC and see if that allows syncing. If so, then you need to figure out ALL of the ports that Activesync needs to sync. Some firewalls can be stared in a mode to report any activity. You can then allow that activity and write a rule for it. Do that while syncing and you should be able to get going.