UPDATE!!! I found out the issue. Apparrently, a small amount of phones that were shipped out use a firmware that is incompatible/bugged for data calls from any device. The version of the firmware that is like this is 8700_2.03.00R. I am going to go down to a Verizon store soon and have it swapped for one without the defective firmware. After calling Verizon and having the tech unofficially hint at this, I found a thread at HowardForums (
http://www.howardforums.com/showthre...hreadid=465822) about my exact issue several were experiencing awhile back. The only fix was to swap the phone.
This is being posted for posterity's sake, as well ;) :).